Dear Friends, Drodzy Przyjaciele, Cari Amici,
These past 6 weeks have been very taken with the sudden illness and death of my brother Gioffredo and I have written much about it. But I want to share with you that already I have some new Joy and new Energy surfacing from inside of me. I know that staying with the Grief, feeling the Cement in my Blood, crying my tears, and Embracing 100% of the experience is what helps me to not get “stuck” in yesterday, it helps me to move through it.
I have had an amazing turn of events happen this week. I was sought out by an organization that does Memory Care and Hospice Care in small, home-like setting. They are expanding and opening a new 6 bed home and they contacted me to ask me if I was willing to apply for the Director of the House position! I had interviewed with them last year, but at that time they only had part time positions available, so I did not take a job with them.
It was a memorable interview last year, and it felt like such a great place and perfect fit…the only thing that did not work was that they simply did not have full time positions open. But the Director and owner of the house kept my resume on file, because they also felt I was a good fit for them, and so they contacted me this week, now that they are expanding!
It is going to be almost twice the pay that I earn now, and it will use more of my abilities and skills. It means that I will be able to truly provide for myself in a way that I have never been able. My skills and experience are very strong…but I do not have a College Degree, and that has been an obstacle in that no company has interviewed me for manager/director positions because of that.
And this came to me, all by itself!!! I am thrilled and feel like my brothers Gioffredo and Angelo are looking at me from Heaven and praying for me and rejoicing with me and that they probably had something to do with this wonderful turn of events.
This new job will begin in September, so I have given my notice at my current place of employment. My manager was very disappointed, but also very understanding. Her respect of me and my care for the clients is real, and very affirming. Although this is a wonderful, new and exciting adventure ahead of me, and it feels like the break I have needed in this time of my life, I will need to spend a little time to quietly Grieve and Let Go of my current clients, and co-workers. I will have to say Good-Bye.
Something that is very important to me is that I stay Grounded and Present in my current job and living situation until I am actually Gone.
I told my manager, “I promise I will STAY until I Leave…”
It is so easy to emotionally, and mentally Leave the Present Moment when we are getting close to something new happening. The anticipation and excitement of the new can pull strongly. But life only happens right Here and Now, and so even while I spend time in getting a new place to live and prepare for my new job, my commitment to Healing and Recovery in every Aspect of My Life means that I will stay Present and Conscious every moment. I need to Be in the Here and Now.
Living that way feels so solid and real, it actually makes my bones feel stronger when I am fully Present, Now.
My dear friends, as you have shared my Grief, please also share my Joy. Life is a River, flowing and shifting and Moving us all through waves of Joy and Grief and back to Joy again. I am so grateful to be Alive in Life!
With Love and Respect, z Miłością i Zaangażowaniem, Con Amore e Impegno
Gabriel Orion Marie
* For those of you who may not know, I have published a series of three books that tell the story of my recovery and healing from profoundly intense physical, sexual and spiritual abuse. These books have dozens of paintings that I did during my process and those paintings are a core form of communication I used in my Healing. These books are available on Amazon. I hope you will read them and pass them on to others!
This White House (Book One), Going Sane (Book Two) and A Spectacular Dawn (Book Three)